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Aaron N. Tubbs

Dragon chaser.

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Since first hearing about Five Guys I had to go and try the famous burgers and french fries myself.

Stupefied by a restaurant that received both a 25 and a “best cheap eats” from Zagat, it was worth the relatively short drive to Orange. In an unassuming storefront in a half-decrepit strip mall I found them to be rather busy for early on a Saturday. Inside the rather large space of the restaurant was a long line for queuing to the register, and a corral for the folks waiting for their order, conveniently routed by the soda dispenser. The entire place is wallpapered in positive articles and reviews about the place (mostly their Virginia locations), and otherwise the place looks like a dump or a dive, if a clean one.

I ordered a cheese burger with mayo, ketchup, mustard, lettuce, and tomato, and a regular fries. The burger itself was two full patties of meat (is this normal? no idea), covered with cheese product (eww, mistake there, wouldn’t do it again), gobs of toppings, two thick buns, and then pressed down and packed into a foil wrap. On top of this is placed a 20 oz styrofoam cup of fresh cut fries, and both are placed inside a large born sack. The sack is then backfilled with french fries again until it’s bursting, and it’s handed to me. At this point the grease has not yet seeped through the bag enough to make it impossible to hold, and I quickly usher it and myself to a bench seat by the window. There’s no footrest and it’s absurdly uncomfortable, but I start my meal.

The fries are pretty damn good. Not quite as good as fresh fair cut fries, but pretty close. I’d say on par, though entirely different, with Fatburger and In-n-out.

The burger itself was unimpressive, and all I could taste was the nasty cheese. If I go back I’ll probably lump on some more toppings (jalapenos, bacon, and the like), and skip the cheese, and be a lot happier.

All told, it was probably the greasiest meal I’ve had in years; I’d go back, but probably not out of my way. 7/10